Now I'm letting silence do all the talking...

Bleed it out!! Bleed it out!! No more sad song quotes. No more subliminal stabs. No more ass dragging. No more bottom lip out sulking.No more cancer inducing. No more blame gaming. No more shame. No more. NO MORE. This year, 3 weeks in, has already been one of the worst. I’m officially starting the “SHITBETTERGETAWESOMEQUICK” CAMPAIGN  09’. I’ve been in a cave for almost a month, waddling in my own self-pity. Yesterday I WOKE UP and stepped out of it only to see that nothings really changed. It’s still cold outside, having wet feet still pisses me off, BUT I’M HERE. For Fuck sakes, I’M HERE. ALIVE. Alive and Lively. My eyes have duffel bags under them, i my finger tips are nailless and bloody, my body feels like makeshift tank rolling its way through the rest of this tour. There are however many many things to be thankful for. My Band, I love you motherfuckers more than you’ll ever know. Our crew, you bust your asses and its appreciated. My Family, as distant as the past 5 years has made us, not a day goes by that i dont think about you, ALL OF YOU. My friends, I would not be here, ALIVE, if not for your kind words and encouragement. Bob and Jd, my two dads, you guys keep the wires grounded, sometimes i feel like im going to spontaneously combust, you guys remind me that shit only happens on Unsolved Mysteries. PumpkinFace, I love you beyond words. We both have a lot of screws that need to be tightened. Alot of hedges that need trimming but i know as much as you do that so did Jack and Sally, Johnny and June, Donny and Roberta, the last one may not be the best example, but you get it. Peter, I am my brother’s keeper, you keep me from losing touch, the big brother I begged for when mine were no where to be found. Pain, you’re laugh can make my worst day seem alright.Thank you all. From this day fourth, I am and will remain a changed man, emphasis on the last word. PS. Point me out a perfect man, i’ll call you a liar and pick out at least one flaw but at the end of the day it’s our imperfections that make us who we are. Who am I anyway? A confused  young man from Geneva,NY. Trying to put the pieces together before 30 comes knocking. 

FORGET HER

while this town is busy sleeping
all the noise has died away
i walk the streets to stop my weeping
‘cause she’ll never change her ways

don’t fool yourself
she was heartache from the moment that you met her
my heart feels so still
as i try to find the will to forget her somehow
oh i think i’ve forgotten her now

her love is a rose pale and dying
dropping her petals and men unknown
all full of wine the world before her
was sober with no place to go

don’t fool yourself
she was heartache from the moment that you met her
my heart is frozen still
cause i try to find the will to forget her somehow
she’s somewhere out there now

oh my tears are falling down as i try to forget
her love was a joke from the day that we met
all of the words all of the men
all of my pain when i think back to when
remember her hair as it shone in the sun
the smell of the bed when i knew what she’d done
tell yourself over and over you wont ever need her again

But don’t fool yourself
she was heartache from the moment that you met her
oh my heart is frozen still
as i try to find the will to forget her somehow
she’s out there somewhere now

oh
she was heartache from the day that i first met her
my heart is frozen still
as i try to find the will to forget you somehow
cause i know you’re somewhere out there right now

I'M NOT OKAY.......

Headed back to NYC tomorrow morning for a couple days to regroup. I miss my condo. The smell, my bed. smoking a cigarette, flipping through a good magazine and listening to sam cooke while I #2. A looong hot bath is in order. CITY CRAB, have them steamed for me with an extra butter on the side. Thank you. oh man, i’m counting down the hours. REAL FRIEND(S), 2 DAYS OF NESTING. Who could ask for anything more????